Another angry post.
So I was having lunch with my family on Sunday, like every Sunday.
And we were having boring Sunday conversations, like every Sunday.
The topic: My sister's friend.
So my dad starts talking about his first impression about her:
"I remember that when I found out you were hanging out with her, I told myself, why would my own daughter hang out with anyone like this? I mean, her family is gay!"
Ok, now what is that supposed to mean?
"Yeah, her uncle is gay! And apparently he has a boyfriend and stuff..."
So having a boyfriend is even worst than being gay?
See, in Lebanon every family has a reputation! Thus the expression "Iben 3ayleh" (or the family son?).
For my dad (& a lot of other homophobic/ignorant Lebanese), if a member of the family is gay, the whole family's reputation is ruined! The family is gay.
Does that even make sense? Well, not for me.
And there is more!
"I gave the girl a chance. And turns out she's not like her family! She is really sweet and fun."
Gave her a chance? What's that supposed to mean?
He basically said: I am a really nice guy for opening my heart and letting the niece of a gay guy enter my house and talk to my children.
What will he do when he'll find out that the gay is actually in his house already?
Ignorance.
"What will he do when he'll find out that the gay is actually in his house already?"
ReplyDeleteThat's exactly what I say 2 myself whenever there's some form of gay bashing or snarky comment about homosexuality in MY house.
What u said is so true. When one member of the family is GAY (or a drug addict OR a girl who's not a virgin), the family's reputation is "ruined".
That's what My mom FIRST thought about when I came out to her: "What would happen if someone knew??!!"
Very relatable post!
well, i already told my dad im gay... he's sweet, too sweet... when i told him he said my heart is breaking on the inside.. now i feel bad because i can't get a bf, whenever i do, i remember my dad saying "talk to god he helped lots of ppl on the internet (hands me a paper) see! read it!"
ReplyDelete-_-
Keep up the great posts, Karim. We are all rooting for you. Lebanese families are obsessed with their reputation especially when it comes to homosexuality or the virginity of their daughters. It's something so terribly backwards, yet the more we speak out about it, the more we can hope to change the situation :)
ReplyDelete@Grit: I've actually been through some episodes of Brothers & Sisters with him, and trust me, I've learned words I didn't want to hear!
ReplyDelete@PeaceBoy: I hope your mom got past that. Don't blame her for being shocked though!
@Anonymous: Oh dear! The God thing, how annoying is that?
I hope that one day he will learn to love you, realize you're his son after all...
@BeirutBoy: This is so truuee! Every family tries to hard to be perfect!
@Daisy: That's what we are all trying to do ;-) Change!
Thank you for your comments! :-D
At least you had that talk from your dad, my cousin who is just seventeen had the guts to tell me gay people deserve to die when I posted an anti-bullying post on facebook. Good luck Lebanon, I doubt the country will ever get better with the amount of ignorance we have.
ReplyDeleteI always had hope in the Lebanese youth with all these movies/series/whatever about tolerance and all, but I guess you can never expect anything from anyone. :-/
ReplyDeleteouch!
ReplyDeleteit hurts most when you hear it from the people you love. :/
I wish I could say he is part of the people I love...
ReplyDelete