Ok, I came out to my friend. What happens next?
You don't know how stuffed with wrong ideas your friend's mind can be, so you have to be here to answer his questions. It might be hard for him/her too!
Here are some commons reactions you might get:
How do you know that you're gay if you never had sex yet?
How do you know that you're straight if you never had sex yet?
Exactly the same thing. If you never had sex with anyone doesn't mean you don't know who you want to have sex with!
You don't need to taste both flavors to see which one you prefer, then decide that you're gay or straight.
Sexuality isn't a choice!
(But then again, that is if you are sure about your sexuality. If you're confused, that's a whole other story)
People say that, a man is happy as long as his penis is. (Same thing applies to woman, trust me, they are as dirty as us, if not more!)
Well, your penis is happy when you see a hot woman. My penis is happy when I see a hot guy.
Therefore, guys make me happy and I want to date guys.
If you're in a relationship, are you going to be the man or the woman?
This is the funniest one I got!
If we keep the bedroom away from the topic, it's still called same-sex relationship for a reason!
Every guy has a type I guess, but if you're macho or super manly, you don't have to go out with some feminine guy just cause there has to be a "woman" in the relationship!
A feminine guy is a guy.
Moreover, we all grow up with this imagine of the perfect opposite-sex couple.
The man who goes to work, provide for the family.
The stay-at-home mom, who cooks dinner.
Now more and more we can spot a lot of couples that do not follow this stereotype: Single moms or dads, stay-at-home dads...
Does that mean you'll never fall in love?
A relationship is based on love and nothing else. Being with someone from the same sex as you does not mean this person only pleases you in bed, this person also makes you happy.
Gay relationships are not only about sex!
Are you mentally ill?
Being gay is not a mental illness! It is not some kind of abnormal sickness, and it is not freaking contagious!
Yes, the suicide rate for gay teenager is higher than for normal teenager.
But as long as you haven't been gay, you cannot imagine the confusion, the trust-issues, the challenges, the loneliness, the homophobia, the bullying, the name-calling every gay man or woman has to face every day!
So, the depressions are caused only by the society we live in.
Don't forget that every time you come out to someone, every time you clear these ideas up, every time someone accepts you for who you are, you are making this world a better place and fighting against homophobia and ignorance!
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Stalking Much?
Look kid, I know that you admire me and that you respect me so much that you freaking Googled my Twitter bio to see where I got it from.
But when you find something as personal as my my blog, which I never wanted to share with you, basically cause you scare the hell out of me, you don't start to read every freaking post I posted, and you don't start to tweet about every link I posted on there either.
AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO TWEET ABOUT RAINBOW BACKGROUNDS EITHER!
Now I know you're doing everything you do to get my attention.
You got my attention. Happy now?
I'm writing a freaking blog post, cause I know you'll read it in the next five minutes, to tell you to BACK OFF!
You don't go talk about my life with some stranger you think is your BFF!
I never wanted to share this with you, why are you sharing this with someone you barely know? Now I know you get attached to the first thing that moves in front of you, that's your problem, don't make it mine!
You stubborn little kid. Go get some affection elsewhere!
Do you want me to shoo you away like a stray dog or something? Just leave me alone! GOSHHHH...
Oh, and one more thing, I DON'T WANT YOU LADY GAGA INTERVIEWS OR CONCERTS OR WHATEVER!
And don't you dare tell me how sorry you are, cause I don't want to know!
Jesus Christ...
But when you find something as personal as my my blog, which I never wanted to share with you, basically cause you scare the hell out of me, you don't start to read every freaking post I posted, and you don't start to tweet about every link I posted on there either.
AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO TWEET ABOUT RAINBOW BACKGROUNDS EITHER!
Now I know you're doing everything you do to get my attention.
You got my attention. Happy now?
I'm writing a freaking blog post, cause I know you'll read it in the next five minutes, to tell you to BACK OFF!
You don't go talk about my life with some stranger you think is your BFF!
I never wanted to share this with you, why are you sharing this with someone you barely know? Now I know you get attached to the first thing that moves in front of you, that's your problem, don't make it mine!
You stubborn little kid. Go get some affection elsewhere!
Do you want me to shoo you away like a stray dog or something? Just leave me alone! GOSHHHH...
Oh, and one more thing, I DON'T WANT YOU LADY GAGA INTERVIEWS OR CONCERTS OR WHATEVER!
And don't you dare tell me how sorry you are, cause I don't want to know!
Jesus Christ...
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Let's Talk About... Sex!
Why is a 16-year-old kid talking about sex?
1- I think we are lucky to have a doctor that comes every year at school to talk about sex and STDs. Rare are the schools that does that. Now of course, we haven't reached the point where the doctor starts talking about gay sex, but at least she keeps religion out of the topic, even if we're in a Catholic school.
2- Apparently, some people think that teenagers should know nothing about sex and never talk about it...
3- My friend's mom said that gay people tend to feel lonely, especially in Lebanon where finding someone is so hard. She said that sometime your loneliness reaches a point where you would just hook up with anybody. I do not completely agree but there's some truth in that.
Why are gay men more exposed to STDs?
Anal sex is the riskier sex act. It is riskier than both vaginal or oral sex whether it is penetrative or receptive... or whether you're top or bottom.
How to protect yourself? (Anal sex)
Always ask your partner about his health history!
Some STDs can be treated with antibiotics, but the risk exists until the treatment is complete.
If you are HIV+ you should share it with your partner, don't wait for him to ask. If both of you are HIV+, you'll still have to take some precautions since you can contract new strains of HIV.
A latex condom is a great way to reduce the risk of exposure to STDs, but a condom can break. To reduce the likelihood of this happening, use water-based lube instead of petroleum jellies.
I've watched this great commercial at the Night of the AdEaters! Loved it :)
1- I think we are lucky to have a doctor that comes every year at school to talk about sex and STDs. Rare are the schools that does that. Now of course, we haven't reached the point where the doctor starts talking about gay sex, but at least she keeps religion out of the topic, even if we're in a Catholic school.
2- Apparently, some people think that teenagers should know nothing about sex and never talk about it...
3- My friend's mom said that gay people tend to feel lonely, especially in Lebanon where finding someone is so hard. She said that sometime your loneliness reaches a point where you would just hook up with anybody. I do not completely agree but there's some truth in that.
Why are gay men more exposed to STDs?
Anal sex is the riskier sex act. It is riskier than both vaginal or oral sex whether it is penetrative or receptive... or whether you're top or bottom.
How to protect yourself? (Anal sex)
Always ask your partner about his health history!
Some STDs can be treated with antibiotics, but the risk exists until the treatment is complete.
If you are HIV+ you should share it with your partner, don't wait for him to ask. If both of you are HIV+, you'll still have to take some precautions since you can contract new strains of HIV.
A latex condom is a great way to reduce the risk of exposure to STDs, but a condom can break. To reduce the likelihood of this happening, use water-based lube instead of petroleum jellies.
I've watched this great commercial at the Night of the AdEaters! Loved it :)
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
24 hours later... Lebanon's IDAHO posters
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
To The Streets! Lebanon's IDAHO.
We finally did it! I've been procrastinating this for a week, mainly because I was freaking scared.
But after my friends told me they were overexcited about it. We did it.
We started hanging the IDAHO posters just after getting out of Fedex Sassine, walked to TSC Ashrafieh, then all the way to Sodeco, posted a couple on Aabd El Wahab, Rue du Liban and Huvelin.
I'll admit it, my heart was beating like it never did, and everytime some guy was walking next to us I would just sit and wait for him to pass.
I was freaked out the whole time while my friends were so relaxed and calm, which freaked me out some more!
Funniest moment of the night: Overexcited friend who took pictures with every posted they hanged and me stressing and screaming and looking everywhere to make sure nobody sees us.
Worst moment of the night: While hanging a poster, a car stopped. Someone opens the window and I see... my cousin. He asked what we were hanging. I've imagined this scenario the whole night so I spontaneously came out with a nice lie while standing between him and the poster.
We still have a lot of posters, and we're going to post the rest on Friday!
Thanks to the awesome friends and to the great Art Director @Zoozel
But after my friends told me they were overexcited about it. We did it.
We started hanging the IDAHO posters just after getting out of Fedex Sassine, walked to TSC Ashrafieh, then all the way to Sodeco, posted a couple on Aabd El Wahab, Rue du Liban and Huvelin.
I'll admit it, my heart was beating like it never did, and everytime some guy was walking next to us I would just sit and wait for him to pass.
I was freaked out the whole time while my friends were so relaxed and calm, which freaked me out some more!
Funniest moment of the night: Overexcited friend who took pictures with every posted they hanged and me stressing and screaming and looking everywhere to make sure nobody sees us.
Worst moment of the night: While hanging a poster, a car stopped. Someone opens the window and I see... my cousin. He asked what we were hanging. I've imagined this scenario the whole night so I spontaneously came out with a nice lie while standing between him and the poster.
We still have a lot of posters, and we're going to post the rest on Friday!
Thanks to the awesome friends and to the great Art Director @Zoozel
Today is International Day Against Homophobia!
For a while now, you have been reading stories submitted by readers on Lebanon's IDAHO blog!
You also might have spotted some posters about the day. (Check pictures on Beirut Boy's and Gaytheist's blog)
But now, it's out turn to share our stories!
With each “Ya foufou”, I’m getting stronger.
I will keep on walking, I’m happy with myself, my sexuality and my life.
You say I am plagued with a disease even though I might be your saviour doctor.
Accept us as we are, cause we are not going to change.
Every day at school, I have to get through the most hateful comments and actions.
I’m not going to let my love be a brick used to sink me.
I’m on the right track to self accomplishment doing my thing my way in my country.Read all about it here!
The LebIDAHO team:
Art Director: @zoozel
Thursday, May 12, 2011
The Pink Shorts.
A couple of friends got me some Tommy Hilfiger pink shorts for my birthday. I was so excited to show them to my parents, I was so proud of them. So I wear my shorts, get out of my room. First thing my dad says:
I'm sorry? What is there to be sorry about? If people knew I was gay just by looking at me in the street, I would walk taller and prouder than ever!
People? Are you afraid that the neighbors are going to see some pink shorts and judge me? Well, they are not all as narrowed minded as you are! Then they will talk like typical Lebanese people, rumors are going to spread a little bit everywhere in town. Oh, no! Maybe the people from church will hear about it, and then pray for the soul of your gay son who is going to hell! Maybe the people from work will also hear about it and start giving you weird looks in the office.
Think? Oh, if only you knew.
Gay? Stereotypes, Stereotypes, Stereotypes. Pink means gay now? Oh, I have some very straight friend who wear pink! It is actually really sexy and manly! If only you just got out of the 50s and looked around you, you would see how the world changed. You would have a cultural shock or something... Oh, you're just stuck between your office and church. Look around you! Welcome to the 20th century...
Sometime 10 words can mean so much more than 10 words.
"I'm sorry but people will think you're gay."
I'm sorry? What is there to be sorry about? If people knew I was gay just by looking at me in the street, I would walk taller and prouder than ever!
People? Are you afraid that the neighbors are going to see some pink shorts and judge me? Well, they are not all as narrowed minded as you are! Then they will talk like typical Lebanese people, rumors are going to spread a little bit everywhere in town. Oh, no! Maybe the people from church will hear about it, and then pray for the soul of your gay son who is going to hell! Maybe the people from work will also hear about it and start giving you weird looks in the office.
Think? Oh, if only you knew.
Gay? Stereotypes, Stereotypes, Stereotypes. Pink means gay now? Oh, I have some very straight friend who wear pink! It is actually really sexy and manly! If only you just got out of the 50s and looked around you, you would see how the world changed. You would have a cultural shock or something... Oh, you're just stuck between your office and church. Look around you! Welcome to the 20th century...
Sometime 10 words can mean so much more than 10 words.
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Sheldon Lee Cooper B.S. M.S. M.A. Ph.D. Sc.D.
Sheldon: I made tea.
Leonard: I don't want tea.
Sheldon: I didn't make tea for you. This is my tea.
Leonard: Then why are you telling me?
Sheldon: It's a conversation starter.
Leonard: That's a lousy conversation starter.
Sheldon: Oh, is it? We're conversing. Checkmate.
Sheldon: Why are you crying?
Penny: Because I'm stupid!
Sheldon: That's no reason to cry. One cries because one is sad. For example, I cry because others are stupid, and that makes me sad.
(Actually happened to me.
Some guy told me that World War 3 was coming and that we all had to close all the windows of our homes and pray 5 hours per day to survive and that God will choose the true believers and they are going to be the only survivors of this war and bla bla bla...
I cried and he looked at me like and told me that it was going to be alright as long as I truly believe. Then I laughed)
Sheldon: I am aware of the way humans usually reproduce which is messy, unsanitary and based on living next to you for three years, involves loud and unnecessary appeals to a deity.
Penny: Oh, God.
Sheldon: Yes, exactly.
Leonard: I don't want tea.
Sheldon: I didn't make tea for you. This is my tea.
Leonard: Then why are you telling me?
Sheldon: It's a conversation starter.
Leonard: That's a lousy conversation starter.
Sheldon: Oh, is it? We're conversing. Checkmate.
Sheldon: Why are you crying?
Penny: Because I'm stupid!
Sheldon: That's no reason to cry. One cries because one is sad. For example, I cry because others are stupid, and that makes me sad.
(Actually happened to me.
Some guy told me that World War 3 was coming and that we all had to close all the windows of our homes and pray 5 hours per day to survive and that God will choose the true believers and they are going to be the only survivors of this war and bla bla bla...
I cried and he looked at me like and told me that it was going to be alright as long as I truly believe. Then I laughed)
Sheldon: I am aware of the way humans usually reproduce which is messy, unsanitary and based on living next to you for three years, involves loud and unnecessary appeals to a deity.
Penny: Oh, God.
Sheldon: Yes, exactly.
The Beard.
Sorry, this is not a post for you all facial hair lovers.
I've been hearing the word 'beard' for a while on some TV shows like Glee and Happy Endings.
So, a beard is actually a person who hide another's sexual orientation by dating him/her or even getting married!
And I must say, this is genius.
The therm 'beard' is also used to conceal infidelity. So, your beard is the person who goes out with the person you are cheating with... Yeah, I won't be needing that... Yet.
Now I know how you're all going to react: Stop pretending that you're someone you're not! Why do you need to hide your true identity! You were born this way, love yourself!
I know, I know.
I'm not saying it's okay to get married, have some kids, then run away with your gardener leaving your family behind and live a whole drama.
Think of it that way: Your beard is a friend who already came out to (in my case, a girl). She just pretends to be your girlfriend when your parents are getting too curious! Not bad, not bad.
I actually have a beard if I think about it. My best friend.
I spend so much time with her, my parents just assumed she was my new girlfriend.
The conversation always goes like this:
Mom: So, where were you yesterday?
Me: Just having dinner with <insert best friend's name here>.
Dad: Ohhhh, were you alone? *wink, wink*
Me: ... Yeah.
Mom: Yeey! She's your new girlfriend isn't she?
*Mom winks at dad, dad smiles at mom*
Me: *weird look, ja2ra* (to myself: New? Was there an old one I wasn't aware of?)
Mom: I knew it! She's such a nice girl, you know, her mom is a friend of mine and she... *bla bla bla*
Dad: Ehh, ehhh! Hayda hakkeh! Hek baddeh yek! Sar rejjel, sar rejjel! *random babbling about how I just became a man*
Me: *Raise an eyebrow: Oh gosh, please get me out of here*
So basically, I'm not lying. I'm just giving weird looks and shutting up, let my parents build me an imaginary life where I am a very straight kid they are so proud of.
My mom also spread this new life of mine to all the friends, family and neighbors. (Such a Lebanese woman, isn't she?)
So when my aunt or uncle calls I get some "When are we going to meet your new girlfriend?", "Why didn't you tell me about her?", "You know I used to play Bridge with her grandma, such a wonderful woman" and the "Kebro el wled! Kebro, kebro".
Feels like I live in a movie.
Don't worry about hiding your sexuality, your family is so determined to see you live the life they expect you to live that they will build it themselves.
Just sit, stare & shut up.
And it helps if you can raise a single eyebrow. That thing pulled me out of some awkward conversations.
I've been hearing the word 'beard' for a while on some TV shows like Glee and Happy Endings.
So, a beard is actually a person who hide another's sexual orientation by dating him/her or even getting married!
And I must say, this is genius.
The therm 'beard' is also used to conceal infidelity. So, your beard is the person who goes out with the person you are cheating with... Yeah, I won't be needing that... Yet.
Now I know how you're all going to react: Stop pretending that you're someone you're not! Why do you need to hide your true identity! You were born this way, love yourself!
I know, I know.
I'm not saying it's okay to get married, have some kids, then run away with your gardener leaving your family behind and live a whole drama.
Think of it that way: Your beard is a friend who already came out to (in my case, a girl). She just pretends to be your girlfriend when your parents are getting too curious! Not bad, not bad.
I actually have a beard if I think about it. My best friend.
I spend so much time with her, my parents just assumed she was my new girlfriend.
The conversation always goes like this:
Mom: So, where were you yesterday?
Me: Just having dinner with <insert best friend's name here>.
Dad: Ohhhh, were you alone? *wink, wink*
Me: ... Yeah.
Mom: Yeey! She's your new girlfriend isn't she?
*Mom winks at dad, dad smiles at mom*
Me: *weird look, ja2ra* (to myself: New? Was there an old one I wasn't aware of?)
Mom: I knew it! She's such a nice girl, you know, her mom is a friend of mine and she... *bla bla bla*
Dad: Ehh, ehhh! Hayda hakkeh! Hek baddeh yek! Sar rejjel, sar rejjel! *random babbling about how I just became a man*
Me: *Raise an eyebrow: Oh gosh, please get me out of here*
So basically, I'm not lying. I'm just giving weird looks and shutting up, let my parents build me an imaginary life where I am a very straight kid they are so proud of.
My mom also spread this new life of mine to all the friends, family and neighbors. (Such a Lebanese woman, isn't she?)
So when my aunt or uncle calls I get some "When are we going to meet your new girlfriend?", "Why didn't you tell me about her?", "You know I used to play Bridge with her grandma, such a wonderful woman" and the "Kebro el wled! Kebro, kebro".
Feels like I live in a movie.
Don't worry about hiding your sexuality, your family is so determined to see you live the life they expect you to live that they will build it themselves.
Just sit, stare & shut up.
And it helps if you can raise a single eyebrow. That thing pulled me out of some awkward conversations.
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Free As A Bird: To Immigrate, or not to Immigrate? - By Ralph H.
I look at the world and I notice its turning.
If I go there is no turning back, If I leave there is a huge possibility that I won’t come back home, back here, back to Lebanon. But it was never my choice to leave in the first place. The only thing I did was get used to the idea of going away, leaving, immigrating, whatever you want to call it. Lebanon has been a breeding ground for hatred, homophobia, disgust, prejudice, loneliness. But it is also my home country, it is where all my friends live, it is where all my memories, or most of them, lie. Every Lebanese person complains about Lebanon, only in the end to say that this is the best country in the world. But is it? Are we only saying that out of sheer patriotism or obligation or do we believe in the words that escape us? In my opinion it is only because we got so used to the traffic, to the people, the swear words, the gossip, the drops of water hitting your face while you walk along the sea front, the shopping, the downtown, Hamra street, Gemayzeh, Monot, Byblos, Fairuz, friends, family, the small villages nestled in the protective twists and turns of the overlapping mountains… the list could go on forever. I think every country is unique in its own way; every country has something worth discovering. The question remains, to move, or not to move? I think most of us at some point proclaim that we cannot wait to pack our bags and leave. I remain one of those people. I am surrounded by these people. It is almost all I think about. Beirut I love you, I love you not. I have found more freedom abroad, freedom to act the way I want to, freedom to wear whatever I want tom freedom to say whatever I want to… I cannot live in any country where I cannot truly by myself to everyone, where I have to hide. I think everyone feels the same way.
By Ralph H.
Humor or Ignorance?
My friend just sent me this link on Yahoo! Answers.
Question:
Best Answer:
There are some pretty hilarious answers too! (37 other answers)
I also found this page on Amazon.
Talking Gaydar Key Chain?
Akhh... people can be so funny sometimes.
Question:
Where can I buy a gaydar?
I've heard people talk about having a gaydar but can't find a store that sells them, where can I find one? What are the different brands that make them? Are there different models? I would be willing to spend more money on a higher end model if the detection is more accurate.
Best Answer:
They range in price from about 50 to 5,000 dollars. a cheaper model will do the trick but its often worth paying more for a mid to high-range model, as technological advances in recent years have equipped some with extra capabilities such as trans-sexual detection (handy in dark clubs and asian countries), metro-sexual detection, (handy if you are blind but still have standards), bi-sexuality detection (always good to know) and even bi-curious detection.
i don't know where you live but here in Canada they are available at Future shops as well as Circuit City.
There are some pretty hilarious answers too! (37 other answers)
I also found this page on Amazon.
Talking Gaydar Key Chain?
Akhh... people can be so funny sometimes.
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